"Letters to Ourselves." Healthy Memories of Surviving Cancerland: If You Only Knew Then What You Know Now!

 

As I sat in my library and put the finishing touches on my book about surviving cancer by mixing conventional and intuitive healing dreams, emotions flooded my memories, and I found myself laughing through my tears.

Yes, laughing! 

I had reached the mile-marker so many dreamed of…finding  humor in crisis—a sign the storm had passed. So, I sat right down and wrote myself a letter that looked at that long and winding road named Therapy to Survivor from the eyes of a Thriver. 

Dear Cancer Survivor,

We’ve come a long way Baby! Do you remember the “dead sound” on the phone when we told family and friends we had the “C” word? Or how we listened with bated breath as professionals split hairs (when we had so few or none at all) over the definition of Survivor  and Thriver. 

Was it after six months of treatment, the five-year-mark, or the ten-year-threshold?

  

And, remember how we wondered if we’d ever be cured or always In Remission? 

Professors Death and Crisis at the School of Hard Knocks taught us the answer is all and none of the above because, as a three time cancer survivor, our survival began the day we were diagnosed and thriving began a nanosecond later.  We focused on surviving despite feeling like we’d lost our minds to chemo-brain. Yeah, we had big laughs about that, like putting Windex in the refrigerator and the cream under the sink. 

Looking back, those ten years felt like a life-time ago and yesterday, all wrapped up in pretty pink ribbon.... that was scary as hell! Yet, we did it! And then became Thrivers who help others in crisis. 

         

 Thriving was our dream. 

   

Thank God we listen to our dreams! 

Join me for part 2 of this letter when Younger-Self is given guidance.

Bio:Kathleen O’Keefe-Kanavos, author, Intuitive Life Coach, survived three breast cancers found  by her dreams, wrote SURVIVING CANCERLAND: Intuitive Aspects of Healing (Cypress House, Jan 2014) http://tinyurl.com/p7cjfxa   websites: Surviving Cancerland http://www.survivingcancerland.com/   & AccessYourInnerGuide, Hosts Living Well Talk Radio, Om Times Magazine contributor, Cancer Q&A columnist CapeWomenOnlineMagazine, Dream Queen columnist- Wellness Woman 40 & Beyond, BreastCancerYoga, http://www.yourdreaminterpretation.com/about-us/,WakeUpWomen; R.A. BLOCH Cancer Foundation Hotline Counselor. Represented by Steve Allen Media

The Ethics of Trust: Part II

 

 

I am so pleased to welcome back my guest blogger Marcy Maslov who shares Part II of her insights on business ethics and  trust in the workplace. The office is a jungle. Make sure you are armed with integrity or the e-Factor Game.    

 

 

 

 

 

 

 by Marcy J Maslov

One of the very first ethical decisions we make in business (and in life) is whether or not we can trust someone.  In this process of deciding to trust or not, we sum up a person’s character and then create a label according to our own experience, background, and beliefs.  After we create the label we then determine how we will interact with that person: Will we share information or withhold it?  Will we collaborate or do the work on our own?  Will we accept that person’s work or point fingers if mistakes are made? The decision to trust or not determines how much or how little we share about ourselves and engage with others.

 

We do all of this so quickly that most times we don’t even realize we are doing it.  Once our own judgment is made, it is very difficult for us to change our opinion.  We don’t look beneath the labels we’ve assigned to see a person’s true strengths, weaknesses, or hidden talents.  We rarely give second chances for people to change our opinion of them, and we seem to be surprised when we learn about a skill or talent that was not originally apparent or consistent.

Uncomfortable with this discussion?  You're not alone.  As we work with clients, colleagues and workshops participants we are constantly amazed at the "aha" moment of learning about the people we’ve “known” for years and thought we understood.  And what was the "aha" lesson?  That a person’s label “determines” our perception of his or her capabilities!  That our ability to trust a person depends on the label we assign subconsciously.  That the way we perceive a person depends on how they portray themselves and we pick up on that energy without even realizing it. 

Now I’m not going to point fingers and ask you whether you’re guilty of labeling people.  Instead, my question is this:  What hidden talents are You hiding from others that might benefit your organization or yourself?  Take a moment to think about that... and find someone you’re comfortable sharing this “aha” moment with!

 

For information on creating a fun, safe practice arena for resolving real-life ethical dilemmas, contact me at marcy@e-Factorgame.com or visit our website at www.e-factorgame.com.

 

 About the author:

 After watching companies and clients struggle with ethical dilemmas, Marcy J. Maslov invented a business ethics board game to provide a practice arena for solving real-life ethical dilemmas. Marcy is founder and CEO of Empowerment Unlimited Coaching, LLC, a business coaching practice devoted to building strong, ethical leaders and entrepreneurs. She has extensive Fortune 500 and entrepreneurial background that includes facilitating corporate ethics courses, coaching professionals to define and achieve their own success and teaching business owners how to read and understand their own financial statements. Marcy has lived or worked in over 20 countries, including France, Mexico and Canada. She is a Certified Professional Coactive Coach and CPA and has earned her MBA from Duke University. Write to Marcy at marcy@e-Factorgame.com and visit her websites www.coacheuc.com and  www.e-Factorgame.com for special coaching and ethics program offers.

 About the author- Kathleen O’Keefe-Kanavos is a three- time breast cancer survivor who penned SURVIVING CANCERLAND. www.survivingcancerland.com , Radio Co-host, keynote & high paid speaker, www.WakeUpWomen.com member & is represented by  Steve Allen PR Media. Follow her on her social media links and blogs from her websites & enjoy her free download  @ www.AccessYourInnerGuide.com

Writing SURVIVING RECURRENCE with a Bungee Cord

I really slept late this morning. By late, I mean well past 12:00--noon. I was up well past 2:00am finishing two more chapters in my second book, SURVIVING RECURRENCE. (Many 2s and wells there. Synchronicity?)

Once I am "in the zone" it's difficult to break my concentration and stop typing. "Leave the rest for tomorrow," is not in my vocabulary. By mid-chapter, I am driven. Forget food and water, I'm content in my self-inflicted jail cell.

This driven feeling is more than work ethic or time restraint. It is emotionally based. I must pull painful memories out of hibernation, (often kicking and screaming,) from behind locked mental doors, convert them into word and sew them to page before they can snap back into the dark bowels of my mind like a bungee cord. It is much like reluctantly remembering a nightmare months after having had it--a struggle on many levels.

So why would I inflict such masochism on myself? How does that saying go? "Those who forget the past are destined to repeat it."

I used my notes from my first battle with breast cancer to help me live through stage 4 the second time. Those journals and memories, became my first book, SURVIVING CANCERLAND.

My story is unconventional, but not unique. Doctors are human. Scientific tests are only as accurate as the people who perform and read them. Life is not infallible.

My second book is more than halfway complete because I have my own style of cutting out my literary pattern and sewing it together with a running stitch that can be removed to make adjustments.


I write the beginning and ending of my book--then fill in the middle. By using this technique, I always know where I am and where I'm going with a story that is filled with impassioned twists and turns. It gives me a mental edge--no floundering around in the dark while retrieving dark memories. I never feel like I have wandered off the books path. Rather than holding one tread of the story's line in my mind, I have two. This extra balance anchors my writing so I can interject humor yet not wander away from the serious nature of the main theme.

I've found that writing a book is much like sewing a garment. Somewhere between the beginning and the end product, areas no longer fit. Some seams must be let out, others taken in, and extra material trimmed. But, I always save my scraps! They could be the collar of another adventure.


About the Author- Kathleen O’Keefe-Kanavos has penned SURVIVING CANCERLAND and is working on her second book, SURVIVING RECURRENCE. She is a phone counselor for the R.A. BLOCH Cancer Foundation, a mentor for WE CAN, a contributor to Cape Women On Line Magazine & c4women, blogs on cancer,medical, literary, and spiritual pages listed on her website, and volunteers for many organizations and online cancer groups. Follower her @ website www.survivingcancerland.com, @ http://twitter.com/PsychicHealing, @ http://www.facebook.com/pages/SURVIVING-CANCERLAND-The-Psychic-Aspects-of-Healing/142803307934?ref=m